I first met Kristin during a visit of one of my Ohio friends who wanted to check out one of the shops in the little mountainside town we were exploring. The owner of this particular shop is well-known for something of a theatrical antagonism toward Christianity, which is why my friend, ever adventurous, wanted to see what the place was like. Kristin was one of the two employees working in the shop that day.
At first blush, it might have been easy to stamp Kristin with the stereotype of the kind of folks who work for businesses with such colorful reputations. But as my friend and I chatted with her and her co-worker, as we learned that she hailed from western Pennsylvania, that she had a teenage son who participates in Future Farmers of America, and as I noticed that one of her tattoos was a quote from Psalm 23, the temptation toward a particular stereotype lost some of its force.
Over the next few months, I would stop in from time to time to talk with Kristin; the more I got to know her, the more she seemed to me to distill into a single person, so many different aspects of the culture of the Verde Valley. At length I introduced her to my wife and pretty much everyone who came into town to visit me. Eventually, I told Kristin about the blog project I was working on, let her read some of the interviews, and asked her if she would mind doing one. She eagerly agreed.
Kristin grew up in the Brethren Church, complete with head-coverings and foot washing (the latter experience we shared in common). The primary religious influence in her younger years, however, was clearly her very devout grandmother. It was the teaching of her grandmother that inspired Kristin’s Psalm 23 tattoo. She had learned the psalm from her grandmother in Bible school. But that verse came to have even greater significance during the last weeks of her grandmother’s life. As she was serving as one of her primary caretakers, Kristin asked her grandmother to write down her favorite verse, and Psalm 23:1 is what she wrote down, not only writing it down, but speaking it as a word of encouragement to Kristin. For her, the tattoo serves as a meaningful token of their journey together. “I’m glad the tattoo is the 23rd Psalm, but would have trusted her word given any phrase she jotted down.”
It appears to me that the faith Kristin learned from her grandmother remains the most formative aspect of the way she views the world. While she has, out of curiosity and a desire to better understand people, explored lots of different religious faiths through her life, she still unhesitatingly identifies as Christian, and her answers to my interview questions reflect deeply held biblical convictions.
Kristin affirms the existence of a creator, noting that the universe and life could not have just popped into existence, and that they have to have come from someone with purpose and intelligence. Life has intrinsic value, she believes, because God created it. She sees no conflict between science and the biblical creation account, and believes even in the special creation of humanity, though not, perhaps, in exactly its present form.
When asked about her definition of human flourishing, she talks about humanity’s material and physical needs being met, but even more, people about living with one another in harmony. However, humanity is, in her opinion, far from achieving anything like this ideal. “We live in a world where everyone is always trying to one-up everyone else.” Kristin retreats a bit from the ugliness in the world and strives to see more of the positive. Where others might start the day with the news, Kristin finds it much more helpful to kick off her day with a wholesome episode of Sponge Bob (whose likeness she carries about on her phone case).
It is also clear that Kristin has experienced a good deal of trouble in her life. A very good deal. About some of these things she tells me, about others, she does not. What little she does tell me makes it perfectly clear that this is a woman who has risen above her circumstances. Far above them. But she has not left all of the pain behind. Much of it is still deeply felt, even if stoically embraced. Rather than making her a bitter person, as it does to so many, her experience of this pain has left her affable, sensitive, and sympathetic.
In the early part of our conversation about morality, Kristin seems to display a strong reluctance to identify any particular behavior as objectively right or wrong. But as we continue discussing the matter, it becomes clearer that this is not an unwillingness to embrace objective morality, but more a deeply held concern about violating Jesus’ instruction about passing judgment. She clearly states that some actions are wrong, like murder, hate crimes, and lying. But, she says, “I have to allow God to be in control because he knows all and can forgive all. I wasn’t given the authority as the position of judge, so I try my best not to – even when people have engaged in things contrary to what I believe.”
Kristin doesn’t have a fully settled answer as to why, on the whole, humanity behaves so unsatisfactorily. She doesn’t so much deny the doctrine of original sin, but wonders whether the actions of our first parents are by themselves sufficient to explain the situation in its fullness. Each of us, she says, has our own free will, each of us shares in the same human nature, a nature not perhaps yet fully developed, and in the end only God fully understands why people do what they do.
From this topic, we move on to talk about the Bible. At first, it sounds to me as though she might not fully trust it. But again, as we dig deeper, the uncertainty seems to be directed, not toward the Bible itself, but toward the ways the Bible is misused by those who claim to follow it. “Some use it to spread hope and love, while others use Biblical texts or texts from any religion to establish fear, dominance, and control.” Beyond this kind of malicious abuse of Scripture, Kristin is slightly unsettled by questions of canon (why some writings were included and not others) and what kinds of truth might be lost or obscured in the multitude of translations. “I understand man is trying to make it easier to read, but I do think after reading some of the same verses included in the many different versions that are out now, things can be understood very differently than the way they were actually written.” Nevertheless, Kristin’s conviction is clear, “The Bible is trustworthy.”
Kristin does think that there might be some hope for the human race, that people are in the process of developing, but whether they will ever develop to the point where typical human selfishness and pride will give way to her ideal of love and harmony, that’s hard to say. “It that ever happens, it’ll be long after we’ve gone on to paradise.”
Paradise. Yes. Paradise. All will one day be well, she says, if not in this world, certainly in a next. And, what’s more, all will be well, she seems to say, for all. This latter view she offers in response to my question as to who she believes will attain this paradise. While she grudgingly acknowledges the possibility that there may be some who are excluded from heaven, she is unwilling to posit what might make such a distinction. “It isn’t possible for us to judge who will and who will not be there,” she says. “I can’t even say for sure that Charles Manson won’t be there.” She points to Isaiah’s prophecy that the coming Messiah would be “for all people.” She points to Christ’s forgiveness of the thief on the cross and even of those crucifying him.
To my questions about Jesus, she responds with affirmation of his life and ministry and miracles and death resurrection. I ask her what she thinks about the Bible’s claim that every single one of us deserves exclusion from paradise, but that any and everyone who trusts in Jesus’ death and resurrection has their sins forgiven, and that this faith in Christ is what makes the distinction between those who do and don’t enjoy this paradise.
She looks at me quietly for a bit, then tells me that what I’ve said is rather eloquent, perhaps a bit too eloquent, and that she thinks that it really isn’t as complicated as I’m making it. “My grandmother always told me,” she says, “God is love. It’s as simple as that.” Too many people, she says, wrongly think about Jesus and God as if they’re “angry sky men who are just sitting there waiting for you to screw up.” But that’s not how they’re portrayed in Scripture. God’s love, she says, surpasses human tolerance. No matter what you’ve done, he will always take you back. And the “majority of Jesus’ ministry was spent blessing people, speaking on love, and teaching them.” It’s this notion of God’s love and forgiveness that, in Kristin’s understanding, prevents us from making any arrogant predictions about who will and won’t be in Heaven or why. Because God is the one who makes this call, and not us, our role is not to judge, but to forgive. “It’s my job to show as many people love as I’m able. We’re charged to love one another. It’s that easy. You might not be able to right someone’s wrong or give them the answer to their problems all the time, but you can love them because it’s the easiest way to share a piece of God.”